Normal vs Typical

I knew it was too good to be true - my daughter playing a sport.  The first 5 weeks, while they were not perfect, went much better than I expected.  Back in January our daughter started playing soccer in an indoor facility which offers classes for homeschoolers during the day.  I was planning on signing the boys up anyway and thought we'd give it a try.

Every Tuesday she'd get excited about going to soccer.  Once there, I could see her becoming anxious.  But Tuesday after Tuesday, she'd run out onto the field and I'd see her visibly get upset about losing a relay or the other team scoring a point.  I'd occasionally hear her tell someone they had cheated (they really didn't, she just says things like that when frustrated).  I even heard her fire the coach one morning.  But she'd always tough it out and keep going.  The other kids seemed okay as did the coaches.  I was relieved each and every day we went.  She was enjoying herself.

And then there was today.  She was having an off morning but we had to go anyway.  She went out on the field and within 5 minutes she came walking off the field followed by the coach.  My heart stopped.  I went into panic and defensive mode which is quickly followed by the "I'm so sorry mode."  The coach explained that on a typical day she gets frustrated but today she just wanted to quit and go home.  And for the first time she walked off the turf.

But then he said something that lifted my spirits.  He said, "She is always welcome to come back.  I am guessing she falls somewhere on the spectrum?  We work with all children here.  If she doesn't want to play or feels she can't, she has the freedom to sit out.  But when she's ready to come back, tell her to come join us - we'll be here.  Even typical children need a break."

He said TYPICAL.  Not normal, not regular, but typical.  I hate hearing that my daughter isn't normal because she is.  Yes, her behaviors are not always typical of a child her age.  While we did end up going home early, I went home with a smile.  A smile because I knew she was welcomed back next week, and the next, and even the next.  And that was huge for me especially because she had called him a stupid idiot.